Tuesday, May 01, 2012


I haven't been on the scales since the start of February and I can honestly say I have no idea how much I currently weigh. I would say that it is most certainly substantially higher than my last weigh in of 81 kilos (178 lbs). I know it's a bit crappy to follow along with this little blog when you are interested in weight loss and I am not really losing weight or weighing myself. I am just not in the right headspace to be on the scales right now.
I don't think I am hiding from the number on the scales. I don't need to get on the scales to know it's not a good number. I  can feel the weight on my body in everything that I do... not to mention when I try to zip up my jeans.

I know for most people that they need to see the number on the scales to keep themselves in check and get motivation. It mostly does the opposite for me and I turn myself into a human punching bag because I feel like I have never done enough. When I am weighing myself regularly I tend to start starving myself and shying away from social functions that include food and alcohol. Obviously that is not the way I want to live my life.

Right now I am focusing on exercising to gain strength and fitness and if I was to be weighing myself I couldn't help but turn my focus back on weight loss. I am eating to build my health back up, so this means that I am eating more than the 1000 calories I am supposed to stick to for weight loss. Once again, if I was weighing myself I would only be disappointed in the numbers and I really don't need to beat myself up about that right now. So I am going to keep my distance from the scales for a while longer and just work on eating healthy and exercising.

I do have one goal though, god damn I would love to fit back into my size 16 jeans before the end of the year. I am hoping slow and steady will win the race...


  1. I like reading about other aspects of the lives of the bloggers I follow!

  2. Sorry I know everyone has an opinion, but you have sounded really unhappy lately and I hope this new approach works for you. 1000 calories is really really low even if you are trying to lose weight and if you have been trying to hit that in the past could be responsible for the deprivation and uncontrollable hunger you feel.

    Your body is awesome and it wants to look after you. When you starve yourself and make no mistake 1000 calories is definitely starving yourself it holds on to every bit of fat it can for survival.

    I hope you can find the peace, happiness and health (in all senses of the word mental and spiritual as well as physical) that you are looking for. Good luck with your journey in learning to be kind to yourself.

  3. You are so much more than your weight loss posts!!!!! I'm happy to ready non scale posts :0)

    Strength & Fitness are great goals which I hope will see you into those jeans sooner than later :0)


Awww thanks so much for the comment!